NLP and road rage

We all have the potential for feeling angry when another road user behaves stupidly or drives dangerously. As there are a lot of 'idiots' out there this means a lot of potential for bad feelings.

And have you ever noticed how all the idiots seem to come out together on the days when you are late for something? (All the lights are red as well!) Funny that lots of them stay home on the days that you are early!

Feeling bad about others affects concentration and safety. The way that we respond when another driver cuts us up, tailgates, or whatever, may be based on previous frightening experiences that we have had; this causes our subconscious mind to give the order: "Feel Angry Now!"

Our feelings take over automatically and we find ourselves responding in ways that we would normally regard as stupid or dangerous. We might even feel guilty afterwards giving us a double whammy - wham when you feel angry and possibly lose your temper and wham when the guilt hits!

Gaining control

NLP offers a number of quick mental techniques to help us gain control of our feelings so that we can think clearly and act rationally. In NLP having this control is called being in a resourceful state of mind.

Next time you feel a little 'road rage' coming on have a go at imagining some, or all, of the following:

• See the other car as a cartoon car
• See the other driver with a big red nose, rabbit ears or anything else that looks silly
• Mentally paint the car in the same colour scheme as your kid's bedroom
• Hear 'silly' music coming from the other car
• Hearing the other driver apologise
• Change your own 'mental voice' to a Mickey Mouse or Donald Duck voice as you get angry or bad thoughts
• Make up, and believe, a story about the other driver - Perhaps he is rushing to his dying mother's bedside, or has simply made a mistake similar to those that you sometimes make yourself.

While you are only imagining these things, they are no less real to your brain. The same brain that gets frightened when you have a nightmare because it believes that the situation is real!. The point is, your emotions will be generated automatically by your thoughts - You are in control of what you choose to think.

Although the ideas above might sound slightly silly to some people, I have used them myself and also with student drivers who become easily frustrated or angry with other motorists.

Using simple ideas to break the cycle of frustration and anger will help to prevent full blown road rage.

Take a look at the exercise on the next page and learn to relax about tailgaters ...